This pack is a fifth block of entirely fresh material for the ISEB Common Entrance Composition paper, spanning narrative, descriptive, discursive/persuasive and personal writing. Short questions on vocabulary, sentence craft, punctuation and planning come first, followed by two short levels-marked writing tasks (one narrative, one descriptive) and a plan for a persuasive letter, and finally two full composition tasks (a discursive essay and a personal reflective piece) marked using the grids provided. Spend a few minutes planning each composition before you begin, and leave time at the end to check your work.
1
For each sentence, select the option containing the most powerful and precise word for a piece of composition writing.
(a)The waves ___ against the harbour wall all through the night.(1)
A) touched
B) hit
C) pounded
D) went
(b)The old floorboards ___ under every footstep.(1)
A) made noise
B) creaked
C) were loud
D) sounded
(c)Smoke ___ from the chimney into the cold morning air.(1)
A) went
B) curled
C) came
D) appeared
(d)The dog ___ at the postman through the gate.(1)
A) barked
B) made noise
C) shouted
D) was loud
(Total for Question 1 is 4 marks)
2
State two ways a writer can create a strong sense of place in a description, other than simply listing what can be seen.
(Total for Question 2 is 2 marks)
3
Identify whether each sentence is simple, compound or complex.
(i)'The bell rang.'(1)
(ii)'The bell rang, and the pupils filed outside.'(1)
(iii)'Although the bell rang, nobody moved.'(1)
(Total for Question 3 is 3 marks)
4
Punctuate this line of speech correctly, adding inverted commas and any other punctuation needed. Do not change the words.
close the gate quickly said the farmer before the sheep escape
(Total for Question 4 is 4 marks)
5
Each sentence below has an error in verb tense. Rewrite each sentence correctly, keeping it consistently in the past tense.
(a)'Last Tuesday, Nadia cycle to the library and forgets her homework on the kitchen table.'(2)
(b)'By the time the match ends, the fans already leaves the stadium.'(2)
(Total for Question 5 is 4 marks)
6
Write an expanded noun phrase (using at least two well-chosen describing words or phrases) for each of the following.
(a)the bridge over the ravine(1)
(b)the orchard behind the cottage(1)
(Total for Question 6 is 2 marks)
7
Write one original sentence for each task below. Do not copy any example used elsewhere in this pack.
(a)Write one original simile describing a school playground at the start of morning break.(2)
(b)Write one original metaphor describing the hush in a library during the last hour before closing.(2)
(Total for Question 7 is 4 marks)
8
Write one original sentence that uses personification to describe wind rattling the windows of an old farmhouse.
(Total for Question 8 is 2 marks)
9
Rewrite this sentence so that it shows Aaliyah's feelings through her actions, senses or physical details, without using the words 'nervous', 'anxious' or similar feeling words.
Aaliyah was very nervous before her piano exam.
(Total for Question 9 is 3 marks)
10
Below are four plan notes for a story titled 'The Cracked Window', labelled W, X, Y and Z, but they are not in the correct order.
W: Jake and his sister set up two jumpers as wickets in the back garden, arguing over whose turn it is to bat. X: Jake taps gently on Mrs Okafor's door, the ball tucked under his arm, and explains what happened before she has even asked. Y: Jake bowls the ball harder than he means to, watching it arc high over the fence towards Mrs Okafor's garden. Z: A sharp crack echoes across the fence, and Jake watches a spider's web of cracks spread across the greenhouse pane.
Write the letters in the correct order to show the Opening, Build-up, Climax and Resolution of the story.
(Total for Question 10 is 4 marks)
11
Add the missing capital letters, apostrophes and punctuation to this paragraph.
ravis football boots were missing again he searched the changing room but they were not there dont panic said his coach ill check the lost property box
(Total for Question 11 is 5 marks)
12
Write three different sentence openers to begin a description of an airport departure lounge during the school holidays, each using a different technique.
(a)Begin with an -ing (participle) opener.(1)
(b)Begin with an adverb.(1)
(c)Begin with a preposition or prepositional phrase.(1)
(Total for Question 12 is 3 marks)
13
Write an opening paragraph (about 60 to 90 words) for a story titled 'The Empty Platform'. Your paragraph should create a sense of tension and make the reader want to read on.
(Total for Question 13 is 6 marks)
14
Write an opening paragraph (about 60 to 90 words) for a description titled 'The Overgrown Allotment'. Your paragraph should create a strong sense of atmosphere and make the reader want to read on.
(Total for Question 14 is 6 marks)
15
Before writing a persuasive letter arguing that your school should introduce a weekly litter-picking scheme in the local park, jot down a brief plan using bullet points. Your plan should include: a strong opening reason for the scheme; a specific piece of evidence or example supporting your case; a considered response to a likely objection; and a clear call to action for your reader.
(Total for Question 15 is 4 marks)
16
Each sentence below uses an overused, vague word. Replace the underlined word with a more precise and effective alternative, keeping the sentence's meaning.
(a)The view from the hill was NICE once the clouds cleared.(1)
(b)The dog WENT across the field, chasing the ball.(1)
(c)It was a BIG crowd that gathered outside the stadium.(1)
(d)The music at the party was really LOUD.(1)
(e)Grandad looked SAD when he found the broken vase.(1)
(Total for Question 16 is 5 marks)
17
Proofread this paragraph and correct the five spelling errors. Write out the corrected paragraph.
He was definately going to be late for the interview. The letter he recieved that morning had given him a seperate address to the one he expected, and the mix-up occured because the company had moved offices, wich nobody had mentioned to him.
(Total for Question 17 is 5 marks)
18
Discursive writing task. You are advised to spend about 30 minutes on this question. Plan before you begin and leave time to check your work. (14 marks for content, organisation and style; 6 marks for technical accuracy.)
Some people believe that all secondary school pupils should be required to wear a school uniform. Write a discursive piece exploring both sides of this argument before reaching your own conclusion.
(Total for Question 18 is 20 marks)
19
Personal writing task. You are advised to spend about 30 minutes on this question. Plan before you begin and leave time to check your work. (14 marks for content, organisation and style; 6 marks for technical accuracy.)
Write about a time when you had to look after someone or something that depended on you, whether a person, a pet or something else entirely. This can be a real experience or one you invent, but explain how it changed you.
(Total for Question 19 is 20 marks)
Mark scheme · CE.E23 Writing: Composition Set 5
Question 1
(a) B1 C only, cao
(a) Answer: C) pounded
(b) B1 B only, cao
(b) Answer: B) creaked
(c) B1 B only, cao
(c) Answer: B) curled
(d) B1 A only, cao
(d) Answer: A) barked
Question 2
B1 one valid technique, e.g. appealing to senses other than sight, such as sound, smell or touch (oe)
B1 a second valid technique, e.g. using figurative language such as simile, metaphor or personification, choosing specific rather than generic detail, or showing how the place makes a character feel (oe)
Answer: Any two of: appealing to senses other than sight (sound, smell, touch, taste); using figurative language such as simile, metaphor or personification; choosing specific, concrete detail rather than generic description; showing how the place makes a character feel rather than only describing it; varying sentence length or structure to mirror the atmosphere of the place.
Question 3
(i) B1 simple (cao)
(i) Answer: Simple sentence
(ii) B1 compound (cao)
(ii) Answer: Compound sentence
(iii) B1 complex (cao)
(iii) Answer: Complex sentence
Question 4
B1 opening inverted commas before capital 'Close' (cso)
B1 comma after 'quickly' and closing inverted commas before 'said the farmer' (cso)
B1 comma after 'farmer', then reopening inverted commas before lower-case 'before' (cso)
B1 closing full stop placed inside the final inverted commas (cso)
Answer: 'Close the gate quickly,' said the farmer, 'before the sheep escape.'
Question 5
(a) B1 corrects 'cycle' to 'cycled' (cso)
(a) B1 corrects 'forgets' to 'forgot' (cso)
(a) Answer: Last Tuesday, Nadia cycled to the library and forgot her homework on the kitchen table.
(b) B1 corrects 'ends' to 'ended' (cso)
(b) B1 corrects 'already leaves' to 'had already left', using the past perfect for the earlier action (cso)
(b) Answer: By the time the match ended, the fans had already left the stadium.
Question 6
(a) B1 a noun phrase headed by 'bridge' with at least two effective modifiers (oe)
(a) Answer: e.g. 'the ancient, crumbling stone bridge over the ravine'
(b) B1 a noun phrase headed by 'orchard' with at least two effective modifiers (oe)
(b) Answer: e.g. 'the sun-dappled, overgrown orchard behind the cottage'
Question 7
(a) B1 a grammatically complete simile using 'like' or 'as' (oe)
(a) B1 an apt, effective image suited to a lively, bursting-out playground scene (oe)
(a) Answer: e.g. 'The playground burst into life like a firework scattering a hundred sparks, children racing off in every direction.'
(b) B1 a grammatically complete metaphor stating that the hush is/becomes something else, with no use of 'like' or 'as' (oe)
(b) B1 an apt, effective image suited to a quiet, winding-down library (oe)
(b) Answer: e.g. 'A soft blanket of quiet settled over the library, broken only by the occasional whisper of a turning page.'
Question 8
B1 gives the wind a human action, feeling or intention (oe)
B1 an effective, apt choice of verb or feeling suited to wind rattling old windows (oe)
Answer: e.g. 'The wind rattled at the farmhouse windows, demanding to be let in from the cold.'
Question 9
B1 no direct emotion words used (cao)
B1 includes at least one physical, sensory or behavioural detail that implies the feeling (oe)
B1 the rewrite is coherent and clearly implies the same emotion (oe)
Answer: e.g. 'Aaliyah wiped her palms on her skirt for the third time, staring at the closed door and rehearsing the opening bars silently under her breath.'
Question 10
B1 W identified as the Opening (cao)
B1 Y identified as the Build-up (cao)
B1 Z identified as the Climax (cao)
B1 X identified as the Resolution (cao)
Answer: Correct order: W, Y, Z, X (Opening, Build-up, Climax, Resolution).
Question 11
B1 capital 'Ravi's' at the start, with the apostrophe showing possession (cso)
B1 full stop after 'again' and capital 'He' to start the next sentence (cso)
B1 comma before 'but' and full stop after 'there' (cso)
B1 apostrophe in "don't" (cso)
B1 inverted commas around 'Don't panic,' with capital 'D', comma before 'said his coach', and apostrophe in "I'll" (cso)
Answer: Ravi's football boots were missing again. He searched the changing room, but they were not there. 'Don't panic,' said his coach, 'I'll check the lost property box.'
Question 12
(a) B1 sentence begins with a present participle phrase, grammatically correct (oe)
(a) Answer: e.g. 'Dragging an overstuffed suitcase behind her, a woman hurried towards the check-in desk.'
(b) B1 sentence begins with a single adverb followed by a comma, grammatically correct (oe)
(b) Answer: e.g. 'Impatiently, a toddler tugged at his mother's sleeve, pointing at the departures board.'
(c) B1 sentence begins with a prepositional phrase, grammatically correct (oe)
(c) Answer: e.g. 'Beyond the security gates, a queue of holidaymakers shuffled forward in the heat.'
Question 13
Level 1 (1-2): A simple, largely generic opening with little sense of tension; limited or repetitive vocabulary; the situation is barely described.
Level 2 (3-4): A clear attempt to create tension, for example through the empty platform, a flickering departure board, or a character's reason for urgency; some appropriate vocabulary and sentence variety.
Level 3 (5-6): An effective, engaging opening that creates a strong sense of tension through carefully chosen detail and precise vocabulary; deliberately withholds information; uses varied sentence structures; clearly makes the reader want to read on.
Indicative content:
establishes time pressure, e.g. the last train of the night about to leave, or a departure board about to change
uses sensory or atmospheric detail about the setting (an echoing announcement, flickering lights, a cold wind along the platform) to build unease
deliberately withholds information, e.g. why this particular train matters so much
uses a short, impactful sentence or a rhetorical question to hook the reader
varies sentence length or structure for effect rather than using a flat, uniform style
avoids simply announcing that the situation is tense or dangerous
Question 14
Level 1 (1-2): A simple, largely generic description with little sense of atmosphere; limited or repetitive vocabulary; the allotment is barely described.
Level 2 (3-4): A clear attempt to create atmosphere, for example through the tangled plants or the rusted tools; some appropriate vocabulary and sentence variety.
Level 3 (5-6): An effective, engaging description that creates a strong sense of atmosphere through carefully chosen detail and precise vocabulary; suggests neglect or mystery through specific detail; uses varied sentence structures; clearly makes the reader want to read on.
uses sensory or atmospheric detail (droning insects, the smell of damp earth, rustling leaves) to build mood
notes a specific unexpected detail, such as a forgotten scarecrow or a padlocked shed, to suggest a story behind the neglect
uses a short, impactful sentence or vivid image to hook the reader
varies sentence length or structure for effect rather than using a flat, uniform style
avoids simply announcing that the allotment is overgrown or abandoned
Question 15
B1 a suitable, appealing opening reason for the scheme (oe)
B1 a specific piece of evidence or example supporting the case (oe)
B1 a suitable, considered response to a likely objection (oe)
B1 a clear, appropriate call to action for the reader (oe)
Answer: e.g. Opening reason: the park is used by hundreds of families every week and deserves to be looked after; Evidence: three overflowing bins were counted near the playground last weekend; Objection answered: pupils worried about lost lesson time could take part on a rota basis, one form group each week; Call to action: ask the head of year to trial the scheme for a half-term and see the difference.
Question 16
(a) B1 a precise, more vivid alternative to 'nice', e.g. breathtaking, spectacular, glorious (oe)
(a) Answer: e.g. 'breathtaking'
(b) B1 a precise alternative to 'went' that conveys manner of movement, e.g. darted, sprinted, bounded (oe)
(b) Answer: e.g. 'bounded'
(c) B1 a precise alternative to 'big' suited to a crowd, e.g. swelling, heaving, colossal (oe)
(c) Answer: e.g. 'swelling'
(d) B1 a precise alternative to 'loud' that conveys the quality of the sound, e.g. deafening, thunderous, booming (oe)
(d) Answer: e.g. 'deafening'
(e) B1 a precise alternative to 'sad' that conveys the quality of the feeling, e.g. crestfallen, devastated, downcast (oe)
(e) Answer: e.g. 'crestfallen'
Question 17
B1 'definately' corrected to 'definitely' (cso)
B1 'recieved' corrected to 'received' (cso)
B1 'seperate' corrected to 'separate' (cso)
B1 'occured' corrected to 'occurred' (cso)
B1 'wich' corrected to 'which' (cso)
Answer: He was definitely going to be late for the interview. The letter he received that morning had given him a separate address to the one he expected, and the mix-up occurred because the company had moved offices, which nobody had mentioned to him.
Question 18
Content, organisation and style (AO5, 14 marks)
Level 4 (12-14): A balanced, well-developed discussion that presents genuinely persuasive, well-evidenced points on both sides of the argument; sophisticated connectives of contrast and addition are used precisely; a considered, independent conclusion weighs the arguments rather than simply repeating them; paragraphing and structure guide the reader confidently through the debate.
Level 3 (8-11): A clear discussion that presents reasonably developed points on both sides; connectives of contrast and addition are used accurately to link ideas; a conclusion reaches a clear view; logical paragraphing structures the debate.
Level 2 (4-7): Some attempt to present both sides, though development may be thin or one-sided; simple connectives are used; a brief or unclear conclusion; basic paragraphing gives some sense of structure.
Level 1 (1-3): A largely one-sided statement of opinion with little genuine discussion of the other side; connectives rarely used to link ideas; little evidence of a considered conclusion or planning.
Technical accuracy (AO6, 6 marks)
Level 3 (5-6): A wide range of sentence forms, including complex sentences that weigh alternatives, used accurately and for deliberate effect; spelling and punctuation almost always accurate, including accurate use of connectives of contrast.
Level 2 (3-4): Some variety of sentence forms; generally accurate spelling and punctuation, with occasional errors that do not obscure meaning.
Level 1 (1-2): A limited range of sentence forms; frequent errors in spelling and/or punctuation, though meaning generally remains clear.
Question 19
Content, organisation and style (AO5, 14 marks)
Level 4 (12-14): A compelling, genuinely reflective account that captures both the weight of the responsibility and what it revealed about the writer with real honesty and insight; ambitious vocabulary and precise, sensory detail bring the experience vividly to life; sophisticated structure, for example contrasting the moment responsibility began with how it was carried through, gives the piece a clear shape and a resonant conclusion.
Level 3 (8-11): A clear, thoughtful account that conveys the responsibility involved and what was learned from it; increasingly ambitious vocabulary and specific detail support the reflection; deliberate structural choices, such as a logical sequence and a considered ending, give the piece coherence.
Level 2 (4-7): Some genuine reflection on the experience; an attempt at specific detail, though the account may lean towards the general; simple structure with some sense of coherence.
Level 1 (1-3): A largely literal account with little genuine reflection; limited or repetitive vocabulary; feelings are named rather than conveyed through detail; little evidence of planning.
Technical accuracy (AO6, 6 marks)
Level 3 (5-6): A wide range of sentence forms used accurately and for deliberate effect, including shifts of pace to mark moments of pressure and relief; spelling and punctuation almost always accurate.
Level 2 (3-4): Some variety of sentence forms; generally accurate spelling and punctuation, with occasional errors that do not obscure meaning.
Level 1 (1-2): A limited range of sentence forms; frequent errors in spelling and/or punctuation, though meaning generally remains clear.